F.U.S.E. Family Focus Blog

You pull out of your garage, get to the end of the driveway and then which way do you turn?

It all depends on where you are going

If we want to head North to visit with our youngest daughter we would turn right out of our driveway, but if we wanted to go to Southern Alberta to visit my eldest daughter then we would turn left.

Next month I am heading to the coast? Why? To visit with my daughter who will be ready to deliver her second baby our sixth grandchild.

The first most important question to ask your self is …

Where am I going? And the second most important question is Why?

Have you written out a clear description of what it is that you really want?

You may have been told to do this many times … but!! Where is it that you want to end up? What does it look like?

If you were heading out to go grocery shopping you would already have a clear idea in your mind where to go, which direction to leave your driveway. You would know where to turn right or left and which lights to turn at.

If you didn’t know where it was how would you ever find the grocery store? You would be driving everywhere going down random streets until you found a store to buy groceries, and it may not be the one you like, but since you don’t know where that store is this one will have to do.

Does this sound familiar with your own life? You wander thru each day having experiences but not really the ones you want, but you just make do.

What is it that you want to accomplish? What experiences do you want to have?

Write it down!! A goal unwritten is only a wish!

When you get to the end of your life what do you want to be able to look back upon?

You know, all over this world there are people dying every few minutes… look around you … hey!! We are all alive!! That means you still have time!! You have been given a life, and what is it that you are going to do with it?

On my 40^th birthday I received this knowledge into my soul… THERE ARE NO EXCUSES!!

‘How you do anything is how you do everything’

What you think about you bring about.

The results you are experiencing right now are based on the thoughts you have been continually telling yourself

And what you are thinking about right now is determining your future!

And YOU are responsible for each and every thought that you think, every feeling you feel and every action you take.

Now put a circle around these three things, thoughts, feelings, actions. This circle is called your Circle of Responsibility.

Outside of the circle you can place several letter X’s. Each X represents excuses.

‘It snowed’, ‘I didn’t feel well’, ‘my spouse didn’t wake me up’….. etc..

We attended a 3 day seminar that was about one and half hours away. It was cold, snowy and dark the morning we left. We got out of the house later than we had wanted, and with the weather, and the traffic in the city we were LATE!

Now in my mind I kept thinking all sorts of things, well I was very tired and found it hard to get up any earlier than we did… Excuse!! … The roads were messier than we anticipated… EXCUSE!!

I felt rude coming in late and realized that each thought I was having was trying to justify my actions, but there wasn’t any excuse, we were late because we did not make attending on time a big enough priority. We could have gotten up earlier knowing that the roads and traffic in the city would slow us down. We live in Alberta and have enough knowledge of winter weather to know this.

There are no excuses!!

When you don’t know where you are going, and the outcomes you want to experience then you may find yourself out here, outside of your circle of responsibility, making excuses and blaming life for the results and circumstances you are experiencing.

Let me tell you a little secret… lean over … listen carefully….

Life Happens… to everyone!!!

But is life happening to you or with you?

So here is a really simple formula –

Know what you want and why… this is your key.

Keeping your thoughts, feelings and actions in harmony with what you want and why, is the engine that drives you towards the fulfilment of your desires, of what it is that you really want.

And helping people discover their key, and then coaching them along to get the engine going is what I do.

You cannot start the engine until you have the key.

The next question is the most important question of all! What do you really want? This is a question to continually ask yourself, because if you do not know where you want to be or who you want to be, how will you know if you have arrived. How will you know which path to take? It’s like going on a long trip. You need to decide what type of experience you want to have, and where you want to have it. Then you will know whether to drive there, take a plane, train, or boat. So what DO you really want? Where do you want to end up in 10, 20, 30 years? What type of experiences do you want to have? Take the time to stand in your future, for when you look back from that place you will see more clearly the roads you need to travel on.

When we look back 3 years, 5 years, 10 years, we can tell if our results in the different areas of our life have changed or not. If they have not changed and we want to experience different results then we have, according to Einstein, gone insane, doing the same things over and over again expecting different results. If we keep driving down the same highway we will only see the same view over and over. It is only when we decide to take a new route that the scenery changes. Look at what new routes you have taken over the past few years that have led you to where you are today. Decide if this has been successful for you, and you are excited about where you are right now. Or… are you feeling that you want more in your life, or you just want to BE more. If you continue on this path will it lead to where you really want to go? Some good things to ponder over. 

Where are you at right now in your life? Is it exactly where you want to be? Maybe you keep asking yourself, ‘am I having fun yet?’ Unless you take the time to review your life, where you are at the present moment, you may never get to the fun part. Look over all the many areas that make up your life, the physical health of your body, check to see if you are maintaining your best weight, consuming a diet of raw and other wholesome foods and drinking several cups of water each day and getting regular exercise.  Take a look at how in harmony you are with your beliefs and what you actually do. Step back and look at the various relationships in your life and think about how fulfilling they are; those with good friends, a spouse, parents, siblings and coworkers. Have a look at your finances, and decide if you feel secure and confident with the flow of money coming into your life.  This evaluation is your starting point, unless of course you are truly happy and content with every part of your life.  If after this evaluation you are not content with your present results then it’s time to do something about it and hopefully you can see just what needs improving.